Millcent: August 2016

love more.

Recently I was having a general chit-chat with a friend of mine, and we got on to the topic of being comfortable and loving yourself, accepting all that you are, flaws and all.

And I'm not going to lie to anyone, loving myself took an extremely long time, (a little bit longer than it should have) and I'm still not sure if I'm completely there yet, but I'm definitely in the progress of trying.

Even though everyone likes to believe that they are in full acceptance of themselves, there are many times when we stumble across the gorgeous celebrity plastered across magazines, TV ads, Instagram etc. and it just leaves you feeling totally deflated and jealous because they're flaunting their 'perfect' bodies, and 'beautiful' faces, (how dare they). However, I always try to remember that social media is definitely a 'showy-offy' platform that allows people to glamorise their positives in life and successfully keep their negatives hidden away behind closed doors. So yes, there's nothing wrong with a healthy dose of #WomanCrushWesnesday, but I truly believe that people should be able to appreciate or look up others; Instead of becoming jealous, or worse... become critical of themselves. We need to stop basing our self-worth on the external world, or we'll never be capable self-love. (I'm saying 'we', because I'm definitely included)

We need to instead, stop listening to our inner critics that flood our thoughts with "I'm not enough, I don't deserve love, or I' not as pretty as her/him'. You need to instead start demanding and feeling like you deserve things. Feeling worthy, or like you're good enough, requires you to abandon other people's opinions and start seeing yourself with fresh eyes and acceptance.

READ BELOW FOR MORE SELF-LOVING STEPS..

1. Let go of urgency
- What you need to do is be patient with yourself, relax and take your times, as patience and self-love and don't evolve over night.

2. Appreciate yourself
- Remind yourself to be grateful and start appreciating your beauty and talent as there is only one you. Start off small, every time you complete a task well or anything similar, give yourself a mini pat on the back or a high-five. It all starts with praise.

3. Do things you enjoy
- Whether it be watching a specific series on Netflix, going for a walk, taking that yoga class, switching off with a good book or video game. Be sure to do so whilst disconnecting from social media/ the internet, as it'll give you time to recoup and enjoy the things you love. Maybe try and hang out with any friends, as they're bound to make you feel loved/better and instantly increase your mood.

4. Try something new
- This is in juxtaposition to No.3, but still goes hand in hand. Try something new, learn a new recipe, travel somewhere new, just do something you've never done before, as everyone deserves happiness.

5. Appreciate the smaller things in life
- Spend time outside, take notice of the nature as it'll give you peace and time to reflect on yourself, also maybe finding a love for wildlife and nature, it'll lead to you finding a love for yourself.

Also remember that there's more to life than the ins and outs of daily life, and by this I mean, try not to dwell on the negative aspects of your day, but instead on the positives and the things you completed well.

REMEMBER - No one controls your happiness but you

Millie xx

What I was listening to whilst making this post

Blondie - In The Flesh

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Advice

how to stop asking why and go with the flow.

Recently I've been stressing out, whether it be over exams, (boy troubles) or just general questioning, and I've realised that it has to stop. Stressing doesn't do yourself, or the people around you any good. SO... yes, I/you need to chill the heck out, and just go with the flow.

There are countless ways of de-stressing... and whatever floats your boat, it's probably best to do so, as it's something that will help you to stop worrying. And because I'm neurotic as they come, I've compiled a list of things to carry out in order to refrain from stressing out below.

1. Don't try to guess what someone's thinking
I probably do this day in and day out, and unfortunately it doesn't help me in the slightest. Instead, all it does is make me think of endless scenarios and increase my anxiety levels. So it's probably best to reduce the attempt at mind reading, focus on yourself and deal with whatever the turn out is. If you ever find yourself beginning to 'mind read', just say "STOP!"... Sure you may look weird, but it's better than stressing.

2. Write it down
I truly believe that seeing the negative thoughts that plague your brain written down, can help you to begin to tackle the problems, it also gives you a solid foundation and somewhere to begin. Even if nothing needs to be done to the problem after having written it down, sometimes its just good to vent

3. Spend more time in the present
Try and focus on the present and what you can do to, instead of dwelling on the unchangable past and unpredictable future. One example would be to slow down, rather than focusing on what can happen a week, month or year from now, focus on the present as it will allow you to be more aware of what is happening right now.

Hope I was able to help to keep you on the right track, because evey now and then, eveyone does fall a little bit off track and just needs a little nudge in the right direction.

Millie xx

What I was listening to whilst making this post

Earth, Wind & Fire - Love's Holiday